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The Business of Survival: When Did Living Become a Luxury?

An editorial on economic survival, human dignity, and the freedom to simply exist.

What if I just wanted to exist?

We are born into a world where the land already exists. The oceans already exist. The trees produce fruit. The sun provides warmth. Nature operates through extraordinarily complex systems without ever issuing an invoice. Yet human existence has become deeply intertwined with earning, purchasing, and producing. When did humanity lose the plot and turn living into surviving? The most obvious answer might seem to be capitalism, but the deeper question concerns our autonomy. Generations before us inherited and maintained economic systems they believed would provide sustainable ways of living. Yet the conditions under which millions of people now struggle to survive raise a question worth examining: Who taught us that simply existing is something we have to earn?

Don’t get me wrong. Life requires labor. Whether through food production, environmental protection, healthcare, or technological advancement, human effort is essential to sustaining civilization. I’m not arguing that labor is unnecessary, that resources should be unlimited, or that society could function without economic organization. I’m questioning whether an economy designed to sustain human civilization has instead made economic productivity one of the dominant measures of human worth.

The Economics of Survival

While major corporations generate enormous revenues and executive compensation continues to climb, millions of working Americans struggle to afford basic necessities. According to the Economic Policy Institute, inflation-adjusted compensation for CEOs at the largest U.S. firms increased approximately 1,316% between 1978 and 2025, compared with just 28% for typical workers (Gould & Bivens, 2026). Meanwhile, the National Low Income Housing Coalition estimates that a full-time worker must earn $29.19 per hour to afford a modest one-bedroom rental at the national fair-market rent without spending more than 30% of their income on housing. The average renter earns just $24.84 per hour (National Low Income Housing Coalition, 2026). These figures reveal a troubling contradiction between the wealth generated within our economy and the financial security available to many of the people sustaining it.

Housing is only one part of the equation. Food, transportation, healthcare, and childcare all compete for household income. For working parents, childcare can become an expense comparable to housing itself. The Federal Reserve reported that most families paying for both childcare and housing in 2025 spent at least half as much on childcare as they did on housing (Board of Governors of the Federal Reserve System, 2026). Meanwhile, healthcare costs have become so burdensome that even some medical professionals are reconsidering their own insurance coverage. In September 2026, KFF Health News reported on a physician and pharmacist who opted to forgo health insurance for their family after their monthly premiums approached $1,600 (Norimine, 2026). Although most medical professionals remain insured, the fact that a family providing healthcare professionally could find coverage financially unreasonable illustrates how deeply affordability concerns extend into American society.

These are not extravagant purchases or unnecessary luxuries. They are fundamental components of maintaining a household and participating in society. Yet for many Americans, affording them leaves little room for savings, recreation, or long-term planning. We’ve created an economic environment in which obtaining the necessities of life can consume so much of our income that enjoying the life we’re working to maintain becomes a secondary consideration.

For decades, Americans have been encouraged to believe that hard work, education, financial discipline, and professional advancement provide a dependable path toward success. Yet pursuing that path can also mean accumulating student debt, financing increasingly expensive vehicles, and paying rent while struggling to save enough to purchase a home. Education can improve earning potential, but it does not guarantee financial independence. Employment can provide stability, but it does not guarantee security. The traditional formula for success has become considerably more complicated than simply working hard and making responsible decisions.

Consider someone working two jobs to maintain a household. Losing either source of income could threaten the stability that person spent years building. According to the Federal Reserve’s 2025 household survey, 16% of American adults reported not paying all their bills in full during the previous month (Board of Governors of the Federal Reserve System, 2026). This isn’t merely a hypothetical concern about how people might respond to an unexpected emergency. For millions of Americans, financial instability is already part of their monthly reality. That vulnerability raises a question: Why does maintaining stability require nearly as much effort as achieving it?

Food production, infrastructure, healthcare, and essential services will always require human labor and investment. But human ingenuity has also produced extraordinary advancements in automation, communication, and efficiency. If technological progress allows society to accomplish more with fewer resources, why hasn’t that progress consistently translated into greater freedom for the people doing the work?

The Rat Race Disguised as Achievement

We’ve been conditioned to pursue education, employment, promotions, and professional advancement as milestones of success. We accumulate qualifications to access opportunities that may otherwise remain unavailable. As we advance, we’re often expected to accept greater responsibilities in exchange for higher compensation. Yet increased earnings don’t necessarily eliminate financial pressure, particularly when housing costs, debt, and other obligations continue to consume household income. Reaching one milestone frequently introduces another expectation rather than a meaningful opportunity to enjoy what we’ve accomplished.

Somewhere along the way, our sense of value became closely associated with occupation, income, professional status, education, and possessions. We celebrate financial success while frequently treating unemployment, poverty, and economic dependence as reflections of personal inadequacy. But does a person’s humanity become less valuable when they’re unemployed, retired, disabled, providing unpaid care, or choosing a lifestyle that produces less economic output? When did our worth become so closely connected to participation in a financial system that humanity itself predates?

Job insecurity, excessive workloads, underemployment, and poor work-life balance are not merely professional inconveniences. They can affect physical health, emotional well-being, relationships, and the ability to enjoy life outside employment. The World Health Organization and International Labour Organization estimated that working 55 hours or more per week contributed to approximately 745,000 deaths worldwide from stroke and ischemic heart disease in 2016 (World Health Organization & International Labour Organization, 2021). The pursuit of economic progress becomes difficult to celebrate when the conditions under which that progress is achieved can compromise the well-being of the people responsible for it.

When Pleasure Becomes a Privilege

Even leisure has become deeply intertwined with consumption. Recreation, travel, entertainment, and social experiences are frequently marketed as things we must purchase. Many workers spend much of their waking lives earning money, only to spend portions of that income purchasing temporary experiences of freedom during the limited time they have away from work. Rest becomes something scheduled around productivity rather than an ordinary part of human existence.

I wonder what this constant pressure has done to our collective sense of whimsy. How often do we pursue hobbies without considering whether they could generate revenue? How often do we allow ourselves to read for pleasure, explore nature, create art, fall in love, rest, or satisfy our curiosity without expecting something measurable in return? Even creativity can become entangled with branding, monetization, and marketability. We’re encouraged to turn our personalities into personal brands, our hobbies into side hustles, and our interests into opportunities for financial advancement. But a meaningful life must have room for experiences that are valuable precisely because they don’t need to accomplish anything.

What Would an Economy Designed for Living Look Like?

In an advanced society, labor would still be necessary. However, human dignity would not depend upon a person’s ability to toil. Economic progress should not be evaluated exclusively through production, profitability, and growth. Security, leisure, health, environmental sustainability, and quality of life should also influence how we define success. What good is a thriving economy if the people sustaining it cannot consistently enjoy the benefits of their contributions?

A society that prioritizes human well-being might invest more heavily in affordable housing, accessible healthcare, paid leave, stronger worker protections, and a more equitable distribution of productivity gains. It might also reconsider how businesses measure the success of technological advancement. Rather than evaluating innovation primarily through its potential to reduce payroll expenses, organizations could examine whether technology improves working conditions, strengthens public services, or solves problems that human labor alone has struggled to address.

Artificial intelligence makes this question especially relevant. As businesses explore replacing administrative, customer service, and other routine functions with automated systems, the conversation frequently centers on operational efficiency and reduced labor costs.But efficiency for whom? When a company reduces the number of employees required to complete a task, the resulting savings can benefit shareholders and executives without necessarily improving the lives of displaced workers. Technological progress does not inherently require that outcome. Businesses could use a portion of the gains to retrain employees, shorten working hours, improve wages, or transition workers into responsibilities that require greater human judgment, creativity, and interpersonal understanding.

Consider what technological innovation could accomplish if improving human life were treated as a primary objective. Autonomous systems could assist with removing pollution from waterways, monitoring environmental hazards, or performing dangerous industrial cleanup. Healthcare technology could help medical professionals detect diseases earlier, reduce administrative burdens, and expand access to services in underserved communities. Automation could reduce repetitive physical labor in occupations where workers face significant injury risks. These applications would still require investment, maintenance, oversight, and skilled workers. The difference would be the priorities guiding their development.

This isn’t an argument against automating administrative work. Repetitive office tasks can be exhausting, and eliminating unnecessary work can be beneficial. The problem arises when society celebrates the reduction of human labor without giving equal consideration to what happens to the humans whose labor is no longer required. If technology allows us to produce more while working less, shouldn’t at least some of that progress be reflected in greater economic security and personal freedom?

Critics might reasonably ask: If people didn’t have to work so hard to survive, who would perform the work society requires? That question deserves serious consideration. Essential services still need workers, businesses need resources, and economic systems must address incentives, funding, labor shortages, and fairness. Reducing financial insecurity would not eliminate these challenges. Nor would every industry be able to shorten working hours or increase compensation without facing difficult trade-offs.

However, the goal isn’t necessarily to eliminate work. It’s to reconsider the conditions under which people work and the extent to which survival should depend on enduring economic insecurity. A society with greater financial stability could still reward skill, effort, innovation, and professional achievement. It could also recognize that unpaid caregiving, community involvement, artistic expression, and other contributions have social value even when they don’t produce conventional wages or corporate profits.

What would business look like if success were measured not only by the accumulation of wealth but also by the needs it fulfilled without unnecessarily exhausting the people involved? Employment could still provide financial incentives, professional development, and personal fulfillment. Businesses could still innovate and compete. But the pursuit of profit would not have to be treated as more important than every other measure of social progress.

Even our relationship with the environment could benefit from reconsidering these priorities. Commuting, resource-intensive production, excessive consumption, and inefficient infrastructure all have environmental consequences. Although reducing working hours or expanding remote work would not automatically eliminate those impacts, economic planning that considers both environmental sustainability and human well-being could create opportunities to reduce unnecessary resource consumption.

The objective would be to create an economy in which human beings have greater opportunities to contribute meaningfully without sacrificing their health, relationships, or sense of self. Work should be one component of a meaningful life, not the condition upon which every other component depends.

The Freedom to Simply Exist

Humanity has achieved extraordinary technological and economic advancement, yet millions of people still experience daily life as a continuous struggle to secure basic necessities. Can a society truly distinguish itself as successful when so many people lack the time, stability, and freedom to enjoy what they work so hard to maintain?

Perhaps the greatest measure of human progress should not be how much we can produce, how quickly we can innovate, or how much wealth we can accumulate. Perhaps it should be how successfully we’ve created a civilization in which people have the security and freedom to experience what it actually means to be alive.

A society should not exist merely to sustain an economy. An economy should exist to sustain society.

We should have the freedom to live, love, explore, create, and simply exist.


References

Board of Governors of the Federal Reserve System. (2026). Report on the economic well-being of U.S. households in 2025. https://www.federalreserve.gov/publications/2026-economic-well-being-of-us-households-in-2025-executive-summary.htm

Gould, E., & Bivens, J. (2026, September 17). CEO pay surged in 2025: CEOs are paid 325 times as much as the typical worker. Economic Policy Institute. https://www.epi.org/blog/ceo-pay-surged-in-2025-ceos-are-paid-325-times-as-much-as-the-typical-worker/

National Low Income Housing Coalition. (2026). Out of reach 2026: The high cost of housing.https://nlihc.org/news/nlihc-releases-out-reach-2026-high-cost-housing

Norimine, H. (2026, September 22). As health insurance costs soar, healthcare workers also feel the pinch. KFF Health News. https://kffhealthnews.org/health-care-costs/uninsured-doctors-obamacare-affordable-care-act-aca-rising-premiums-idaho/

World Health Organization & International Labour Organization. (2021, May 17). Long working hours increasing deaths from heart disease and stroke: WHO, ILO. https://www.who.int/news/item/17-05-2021-long-working-hours-increasing-deaths-from-heart-disease-and-stroke-who-ilo

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Ramping Up

May was a whirlwind! In the midst of getting laid off due to AI, the close of the spring semester for my child and myself, and the weight of carrying my household on a single income I gained more clarity than I have in years. If you’ve been following my Awakening series, you know thats saying a lot! For years, I lost myself in the mundane life of being an employee… working to make ends meet but living with no inspiration. Putting my own business and entrepreneurial goals on the back burner just to merely have the energy needed to work & exist.

As the dust settles, a new life is afoot. One where I understand that the only lives I’m truly responsible for sustaining are my own and the ones I create. A life where self-care is a requirement, not an option. A life where money works for me, not against me. A life where I’m comfortable going out into the community instead of isolating out of comfortability in my room.

The clarity I found was that no matter how much you try and control things… No matter how perfect you try to walk the straight line, as soon as you step off it, the facade you’ve built your life on crumbles. When you strip away your titles, sell off your things, and are left sitting in a mess of your own making… are you strong enough to get back up and keep going? Or would you sit by idly as everything you worked for went down the drain in a heartbeat?

This year isn’t the first time that I’ve had to rebuild my life after a major loss and I’m sure it won’t be the last. But for the first time in forever, I’m clear about what I want and what I don’t want in my life. So with that being said, look out for a ramp up in my presence and content. It’s time I truly stopped playing with my potential.

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The Final Frost, Part 1

The last time it snowed in Tampa, it was 1977. Fast forward, January 2026, and the entire U.S. is under ice storm warning/ freezing weather watch. Although the time frame of the storms are aligned with normal Winter month behavior, this year things were different… It was unusually hot throughout the holidays everywhere. That all ended in January when this Arctic blast shook the nation, collapsing full power grids almost simultaneously as the government power structure in our society seemed to collapse.

Chronologically, this year has quite a few significant anniversaries that are more than befitting for the times. Coincidental, even. America will reach its 250th birthday this year. If you aren’t aware, there is a theory derived from John Glubb’s The Fate of Empires, which explores “analyzing history from Assyria to modern times, Glubb identified a common life cycle: Age of Pioneers, Conquest, Commerce, Affluence, Intellect, and Decadence. Decadence is characterized by economic inequality, materialism, and societal apathy.”

Based on Glubb’s theory, “America appears to have reached the age of decadence, which Glubb defines as marked by “defensiveness, pessimism, materialism, frivolity, an influx of foreigners, the welfare state, (and) a weakening of religion.” (Thomas, 2015) Per Roz Savage’s layout, these different ages span over a number of years each, with Decadence being one of the final ages;

  • The Age of Pioneers: expansion of territory
  • The Age of Conquests: more expansion, not always peaceably
  • The Age of Commerce: wealth is created through trade and innovation
  • The Age of Affluence: all appears to be well, but the seeds of destruction are being sown
  • The Age of Intellect: the acquired affluence enables people to pursue the life of the mind. Academic institutions may produce sceptical intellectuals who start to question the dominant narratives of the empire, undermining its authority
  • The Age of Decadence: people indulge in excessive consumption in the pursuit of happiness, while in actuality becoming less happy. The civilisation creates diversions for the populace, from gladiator fights to Facebook and Instagram, while people indulge in addiction and debauchery. The values and discipline that enabled the creation of the empire are eroded
  • The Age of Decline and Collapse: inequality grows, increasing numbers are excluded from meaningful work and the means to fulfil their potential. Discontent leads to disruption and the empire collapses.

(Savage, 2019)

Furthermore, in coincidental alignments, February 2026 is the 100th anniversary of the federally recognized celebration of Black History Month. In the 1920’s, the prominent Dr. Carter G Woodson created Negro History Week and architected the annual celebration of Black American accomplishments known as, Black History Month. “As the son of formerly enslaved parents, Dr. Woodson understood that denying people of their history denies them of their humanity. “Those who have no record of what their forebears have accomplished lose the inspiration which comes from the teaching of biography and history,” he wrote.” (Melville, 2026)

I could continue on for days with coincidentally aligned dates and times but these two are the most prominent and eerily befitting human events that are echoing their sentiments in this new year. Most Americans, for the first time in decades, are entering the territory of an authoritarian government which, most of us working age and below, have never had to deal with personally on an immediately direct level. The most powerful person in our government is a rouge decoy for all the ultra-rich, powerful people pulling the corruption strings behind the scenes. But for the first time in a very long time, people are fed up and more riled up than ever. Not just politically and financially, but socially and professionally. For years, every single person in America has felt the bubbling up or been directly impacted by a society that is rapidly declining.

January 2026’s Final Frost highlighted the immeasurable depth of corruption that is being inflicted on Americans and negatively impacting our every day lives. The ice storm exposed the weakness of our power sources from the root to the shoot. Power grids across the country failed due to overload. People reeled over the funds they lost preparing for a storm that wasn’t nearly as bad as was predicted. In defense of the meteorologists, we were warned that Trump’s gutting of NOAA & NWS would directly correlate to discrepancies in reporting. “The Trump administration’s 2026 budget appears to be actively working to eliminate the Office of Oceanic and Atmospheric Research (OAR) along with all NOAA weather laboratories and cooperative institutes and laboratories, which provide weather forecasting data and research from 80 universities and work to improve NOAA’s warning and forecast capabilities. Without continued funding, long-term datasets would be disrupted and the NWS’ ability to inform disaster preparation and provide accurate and timely weather tracking would be at risk. Moreover, the president just signed into law the “One Big Beautiful Bill Act,” which, among other dangerous provisions, repealed all unobligated funds that the Biden administration had designated for improving research, forecasting, monitoring, and public communication of hazardous weather.” (“Lasting Threat of Trump’s Cuts to NOAA and NWS on American Communities,” n.d.) 

While Americans faced the physical impacts of cutting crucial funding for weather reporting, Trump’s DOJ released over 3 million files on January 30th 2026 about the case surrounding notorious child sex offender, serial rapist, and human trafficker Jeffrey Epstein. This file drop cemented the publicly known notion that not only is the sitting president directly involved in the Epstein scandal, so is a large number of mostly prominent ultra-wealthy men whose crooked business dealings benefited off the backs of hardworking, law abiding citizens. Everyone from politicians to celebrities were exposed sending the western world into a frenzy. What now? How can a country where citizens are subjected to torturous policing, corrupted government officials, and invasive surveillance, suddenly be so lenient on the western world’s most powerful figures using money and connections to inflict world changing, immeasurable pain on a mass scale? How can a world that has normalized the rich eating the meek truly be sustainable? Truth is, it can’t and it won’t.

John Glubb told us, with evidence, in 1977 that America may have been on the brink of its collapse. “Glubb says the 250-year average of empires has not varied in 3,000 years, but we don’t learn from history because “our studies are brief and prejudiced.” He means they are mostly about one’s own country.” (Thomas, 2015) Although, it may not be 250 years to date, it’s safe to say that there is no American right now who is absolutely sure about what life beyond Trump and his corruption looks like. We’re in the thick of it and January’s final frost may have been the frigid, sharp wake up that American’s who believe in the Constitution needed. As Dr. Woodson wrote, ““Those who have no record of what their forebears have accomplished lose the inspiration which comes from the teaching of biography and history,”(Woodson, 1993,) 

References

The Lasting Threat of Trump’s Cuts to NOAA and NWS on American Communities. (n.d.). Center for American Progress. https://www.americanprogress.org/article/the-lasting-threat-of-trumps-cuts-to-noaa-and-nws-on-american-communities/

Melville, D. (2026, January 5). 2026 Marks The 100th Anniversary Of Black History Month — A Brief History. Forbes. https://www.forbes.com/sites/dougmelville/2026/01/05/2026-marks-the-100th-anniversary-of-black-history-month—a-brief-history/

Savage, R. (2019, October 17). The rise and fall of the human empire. Roz Savage | MP|Ocean Rower|Speaker|Author. https://www.rozsavage.com/the-rise-and-fall-of-the-human-empire/

Thomas, C. (2015, January 4). Thomas: Will decadent America reach empires’ average age of 250 years? https://www.lubbockonline.com/. https://www.lubbockonline.com/story/opinion/columns/2015/01/04/thomas-will-decadent-america-reach-empires-average-age-250-years/15000869007/

Woodson, C. G. (1993). The mis-education of the Negro. 

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Soul Retrieval

After finally coming out of my shell a short while ago, I was quickly faced with the reality of the world again. Although I may have been healed and eager to experience life again, that didn’t guarantee that I’d be met with a world as open, loving, and honest. I naively went into a new terrain in my life where I wasn’t closed off in closed off spaces anymore… I was open entering closed off spaces.

A person who is closed off entering spaces that are closed off (trauma-ridden hearts, places, and things) is rarely affected deeply by the weight of other things that are closed off. Plainly stated, it’s hard to be affected by the trauma of other things and people when you’re so trapped in your own trauma that you can’t even begin to try and process the indirect trauma around you. For example, someone who is jealous, vindictive, and/or self-centered will go into a nightclub and feel insecure, angry, and defensive. This is because this person is unhealed and can only see themselves. So they self doubt, sabotage, and wallow in their own misery not ever considering how the energy around them is affecting them directly.

Once you’re healed entering these spaces, if you aren’t spiritually sound and aware, you become a vessel of energy for those unhealed things to feed off of. Going back to the example, someone who is healed will enter a club with the desire to dance, make friends, and enjoy a libation. But, if they’re surrounded by people and music that is reflective of the unhealed version of themselves, it has the potential to trigger those same feelings that a person once healed from. You can feel the gaze of the insecure. You can feel the heat coming off the angry. If you don’t practice discernment or remove yourself from those environments, it’s easy for those things to re-pierce your soul and make you closed off again.

Recently, I attempted to explore relations with a man who was unhealed as a healed woman. Without going into too much detail, I gave him access, love, and positive energy. Unfortunately, because he was an unhealed man, I was met with manipulation, lies, and disarray. Although my heart was open at the inception of our relations, his callousness, coldness, and cruelty sowed doubt in me with each interaction. I began questioning my worth again, believing the lies he’d say, and even letting him borrow currency despite my own spirit advising me against it.

It wasn’t until he attempted to disparage me publicly with a lie, in an effort to tear down my public reputation to protect his, that I realized that I wasn’t as healed as I had once thought. I openly set out seeking to be loved and for a brief moment was set back into my unsure, insecure self. All because I allowed myself to be in a space where the heart was closed but mine was open.

Now in this period of Soul Retrieval, returning back home to myself after the trauma of being around the unhealed, I have to take accountability for even being in that space in the first place. I knew after our first encounter that it would never work between us. Hell, I knew before our encounter that it wasn’t going to work. But this open heart of mine wanted to love him into being healed. So, subconsciously, the tether drained me. It drained me of positive energy, self-love, and money. Unfortunately, because of money and his refusal to close the loop on an unpaid debt, I’m still being drained by his unhealed energy. Thus, why I needed to address it head on and call back my energy. A liar and a thief has no dominion in my life. The lies he spread about me publicly will crumble under the weight of his deceitfulness and I will be vindicated. His theft of my funds will not bankrupt me. The cord is cut.

The lesson I’m taking away from this experience is… Once healed, going into spaces that are full of disarray, sorrow, and trauma will only set you back on your spiritual journey. Approaching an environment or situation with an open heart in any circumstances requires strength and the ability to recognize when it’s time to walk away and step back into your power. Because staying in unhealed spaces as someone who has done their shadow work only exposes you to the shadows of those who haven’t.

– Ebony Queen

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Breaking Out My Shell

Last week was the New Moon In Leo and I’ve never felt more like myself than I do here and now. Breaking out of my shell meant going through a deep tumultuous awakening in which I’ve talked about in this Awakening series since April now. It’s time, now more than ever, for me to step into the spotlight without fear. I’ve entered the third decade of my life with grace and poise. Now it’s time to really show my ass.

I’ve been trapped in a world of all the things that I couldn’t do for so long, I am a little nervous about what I am open to doing now that I can. I no longer conform to the heteronormativity of monogamy that has held me captive from my own passions and desires. I don’t subscribe to a religion where my deities love for me limits me from life. I am no longer drawn to relationships and friendships that drain me rather than reciprocating the love they receive. Breaking out of my shell has truly been about finally being okay with being perceived, correctly or incorrectly.

In life, the hardest thing to overcome is the fear of perception. We choose certain jobs because they look good to the world, not because that’s what we REALLY want to do. We stay in relationships that are superficial and unfulfilling because society teaches us it’s better to be with someone than to be alone. We dress and groom ourselves based on what society deems is fashionable and if you aren’t aligned with it, you’re deemed unfashionable publicly. Those who are able to break free of these stigmas and thought patterns are the ones who are able to reach for everything they dream of and achieve it. It’s because they can dance without fear of being seen, write without fear of what to say, and sing without fear of being heard.

How can we truly achieve our dreams if the ones we actually have are suppressed out of fear, rejection, and/or doubt? Personally writing, in many different forms, has always been a major part of my innate design. It’s been a guaranteed facet of my life that probably would’ve enhanced my life earlier had I felt the freedom to explore it more wholly sooner.

A great example of this right now is Beyonce. She recently (last night 7/26/2025) completed her Cowboy Carter Tour, the second installment of her 3 act album tour for Renaissance. Although to many of us, it seems as though Beyonce has always carried the confidence that we see her rock on stage, this era showed us a different perspective. Her country album was, in her own words via Instagram, “born out of an experience that I had years ago where I did not feel welcomed.” In 2016, Beyonce was invited to the Country Music Awards to perform her first country crossover track “Daddy Lessons” from her 2016 album Lemonade. Beyonce took that uncomfortable moment where she was made to feel unwelcome in a place where she and others knew she belonged and turned that ill will into her first AOTY Grammy win for Cowboy Carter.

As it applies to my own life, and maybe to yours too, the lesson here is that in order to be your most authentic self, its important to understand and be okay with knowing that someone else’s perception of you doesn’t make you who you are. We make ourselves who we are… and if we spent our whole life living for what others deemed appropriate, we’d never truly be happy. So in this next era of my own, after breaking out my shell, that’s my ultimate destination… Authentically Happy.

Ebony Queen

References

Beyoncé on Instagram: “act II cowboy Carter 3.29 today marks the 10-day countdown until the release of act II. (n.d.). Instagram. https://www.instagram.com/p/C4s6Zr7rlwA/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link

Beyoncé brings out destiny’s child for surprise reunion during final cowboy Carter show in Las Vegas. (2025, July 27). People.com. https://people.com/destinys-child-reunites-beyonce-final-show-las-vegas-11779800

Nytimes.com. (2016, November 4). The New York Times – Breaking News, US News, World News and Videos. https://www.nytimes.com/2016/11/04/arts/music/beyonce-cma-awards-backlash.html

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Awakening Ebony

I’ve spent a lot of time staring at blankness. Blank pages in all the journals and notebooks with fancy covers that I’ve accumulated over the years… waiting for the words that align with the ones flying around in my mind to magically appear on the pages. Blank pages on computer screens… waiting for every story that lingers in my creative pockets to find its way out on its own. I’ve held back from so much in life… writing included. This year, I entered a phase of my life where I am refusing to keep holding back. I have to let go of all of my expectations and fears, and just live… Life is passing me by regardless of if I am nestled away comfortably in my shell or outside being the person I’m destined to be.

A lot has happened in the last few years. For the first time since 2013, I live alone. No roommates, no family, no man… just me and baby girl, day in and day out. For years, I carried around a deep anxiety that would sit in the pit of my stomach. It never seemed to go away entirely. If it wasn’t bellowing deep in my belly during a stressful situation, it was lingering behind when I was trying my absolute best to not feel it. I learned to suppress it as best I could, chalking it up to a social anxiety that I would just have to get used to carrying. Shockingly… as I grew into my new home, adding personal touches to make it my own, that pit began to melt away….

I found myself delving into passions that I had once forsaken for double employment, relationships, vices, and unresolved emotions. As I re-explored myself and my passions I was able to pinpoint things about myself that previously I wouldn’t have had the capacity to pay attention to. I was too busy being the listener for the talker, the do-er for the needy, and the friend that always put everyone else’s needs over her own. I lessened my light to make it easier for others to feel loved, heard, and comfortable around me. I never really got that in return… Now that I was living alone though, I could do anything and everything I ever wanted, without the weight of catering to another adult human being. I was discovering myself…

I’ve always know who I am, in a sense. But I never had the freedom to be my truest self without insecurity, judgement, or reservation. I kept myself from being the full extent of who I am deep down. I refrained from saying what I was really thinking. I’ve refused to go to places that I should’ve went. I am not doing that anymore.

In order to release and live, I needed to face myself. Throughout my years, I unknowingly carried traumas I didn’t even recognize. The largest being indoctrination. I believe everyone should have the freedom to express their love for God how they see fit. However, our society has brought us up to believe that everyone’s beliefs except their own are wrong. Without naming the organization (cause I’m just not ready for that yet), I too was the victim of a religion that enveloped me as a youth and warped my perspective of the world. Not to say that it was a bad religion or that it was evil. It just wasn’t what I believed in. I didn’t feel my connection to God through that type of congregation. But growing up in the midst of it, you learn that speaking up against it could get you in trouble you may not be ready for.

How did that indoctrination affect me in my youth? It kept me from self-love and self-pleasure. It shielded me from the real woes of life as a means of protection, which ultimately, just left me lost in the world. I knew the word of God and stories of the Bible, but that’s not the world I was met with. I couldn’t maneuver life healthily because I was taught that you had to remain perfect even though the world was doomed from the start. This crippled my emotions, my dreams, and my connection with the divine. Why was life even worth living if suffering, imminent danger, and death was the only thing guaranteed?

It took a lot of time, self-reassurance, and exploration to finally let go of the heaviness of doom that I carried around for most of my youth. It wasn’t until I had a seizure at 29 that I finally woke up to the fact that life was passing me by and I wasn’t happy. Immediately, I knew that I had to make changes and the first act of my newfound confidence was moving into my own place again (https://youtu.be/pWLY2Flg0wo?si=JRxyHfNnYGLZpDqQ).

I thank my home for giving me the space to breathe, create, wail, adjust, and live freely...

I am still on the journey of Awakening Ebony… and I am finally at a point where I feel I can share my journey with the world. I am finally ready to show the world who I am, without fear of retribution. Asè.

To be continued…

I dedicate this series of personal newsletters “Awakening Ebony” to my daughter, Araya. You are my reason to love and legacy in life. May you find all the tidbits in the world that I left to guide you as useful. Remember that whether in physical or in spirit.. I am forever beside you.

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Ebony Queen Queendom Entertainment

Book Review

“The Black Girl Survives In This One” x Evans & Fennell 

Better late than never!

I know it has been some time since I promised this book review. As I mentioned in my previous post, Rollercoaster October 🎃 , this Fall/Winter was tumultuous with high highs, low lows, and rarely any break in between. I got myself together though !

“The Black Girl Survives In This One” is a riveting collection of eery stories centered around black women. Its pages ooze illustrious details of various topics such as sci-fi, spirituality, and fantasy. Each stories landscape boasts luxurious features that make the read a journey of the mind. Read and listen to the audiobook for a heightened experience.

Every story, despite being written by different authors, permeates the black experience throughout. From familial bonds and interactions, to friendships and their relational quirks… the authors’ of each story in this collection capture the essence of blackness in a way that makes the scary, page turning experience seem all too REAL. I most enjoyed the balancing of friendship within the stories, as most of them sparked inquiry into my own personal defense mechanisms, loyalty of relationships, and imagery limits.

I would recommend this book to anyone who wants to be taken on an adventure with the reassurance that the main character survives in the end. Although that reassurance provides a safe net, the stories are still both intriguing and frightening. It is collection of fearful fantasies, well stringed together, for maximum terror. Maybe, a movie?

Ebony Queen

Categories
Ebony Queen PanAfrican Liberation Coalition Queendom Entertainment

Sample Ballot Look Up Link 🗳️

Primary elections are gearing up ⚙️

Ballotpedia (@ballotpedia) has a sample ballot look up tool that allows you to discover everything you need to know about your local candidates for the upcoming elections 🗳️

LINK BELOW

Sample Ballot Look Up

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Ebony Queen Queendom Entertainment

America’s Next Top Hitmaker 🎤

http://tophitmaker.org/2024/ebony-queen

Queendom 👑

Voting has begun for the America’s Next Top Hitmaker Competition 🎤

The winner will a chance to appear in Rolling Stone, win $10,000, and perform at Rolling Stone’s Future of Music showcase in Austin, Texas. ✨

As well get the chance to meet some industry heavy hitters for mentoring as the competition heats up 🔥

To stay in the running, I need your VOTE 🗳️

Follow the link below or find it in my bio and vote for EBONY QUEEN 👸🏾 👑🎤

http://tophitmaker.org/2024/ebony-queen

queendomentertainment.com

EbonyQueen #QueendomEntertainment #Rap #AmericasNextTopHitMaker

VOTE HERE

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Ebony Queen

June

Queendom 👑

It is JUNE. We’re officially halfway through 2024. Summer begins this month & we’re kicking off the second half of the year with a bang 💥 Happy Juneteenth ❤️💚🖤 Happy African American Music Appreciation Month 💿🎤🎶 & Happy Pride Month 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️❤️

wishing a peaceful & fruitful month for all 👑

Stay tuned for some exciting news this month 📰

#June #NewMonth #Summer #Goals #Pride #Juneteenth #Music #Black #RentDue